As Ali sees it: Troublesome tourist (me, that is)

Cartegena, Colombia
24-now May 2010

   Some tourists are such a bother! Well that´s the distinct impression I got from yesterdays guide...

   My travel mate Jon and I were going on a tour to the 'mud volcano'. We were the first to be picked up and I chose seats at the front of the bus (best view, more comfy ride). More tourists got on and the guide gave them instruction to sit down the back of the bus, so they did. Then the guide got on and told Jon and I (in bad English) we were to sit in 'behind' of the bus, because that´s where the English speaking tourists must sit. I replied, in Spanish (possibly bad too), that I was happier to sit in the front and hear the Spanish. She got angry. Even the driver chipped in to my defense that I could speak Spanish. But no, the guide wasn´t happy.
   Most the seats were full by then, Jon decided we´d move back. But there was now room to only move 2 seats back! Then the guide came and told me that I should be sitting further back, and it wouldn´t be her fault if I didn´t understand what anything was. She repeated this statement several times, just to be sure I got her point.
   The tour was hardly guided at all, just led, and I heard and understood both languages and managed everything quite ok.
   Other tourists have the reverse problem of course. Imagine the guy from Sweden who was born in Colombia but adopted by his Swedish parents as a baby! He was in Colombia to learn the lingo and find out abit about his heritage. Sometimes some Asian tourists pass as latinos too, and people thus insist on speaking Spanish to them.
   After the first language barrier, the bus stopped to put air in the tyre and it blew. Another bus came for us, but I'm pretty sure the guide tried to leave me behind, since I passed by her and she diverted her eyes just seconds prior to another tourist telling me the replacement bus had arrived.

   The day was great though! The mud volcano 'El Totumo' is a 15m mound which spews mud instead of lava. You take stairs up to the top and climb into the mud. The mud is a lovely temperature and consistency and is said to contain minerals, and today (one day after) my skin feels spectacular. Once in handsome toned black guys give you a massage... well the male tourists seem to get a quick rub, female tourists, noticably single ones (like me) seem to get extended rubs... to the point where you have to tell them 'whoa'.
   Then is down to the lake to be roughly handed by a old woman who strips you in no time, cleans you and your togs (bikini or other), and sends you on your way.
   Oh, and while you are at the top, you have given your camera to a guy who miraculously remembers which camera (of the 10-15 others he has) is yours and takes your photo with it whenever you look his way (which I forgot to look so often).

The day went to a great start.

Getting in, carefully.... don´t wanna slip and fall into the mud!

The muddy you and message you and push you onto the next person.... actually moving of your own free will is difficult.

Me and my #1 masseuse.... I stuck my arm around his shoulder for the photo, after I removed it he looked at his shoulder like 'oh, gross, now I´ve got mud on me!'